The Fox Deity's Accidental Dumbass
by PeanutCrackerBiscuit
Summary: AU! Kageyama is a black nine-tailed fox deity about to be married to the beautiful Shimizu of the great fox clan and Hinata is a homeless, jobless and penniless 23 year old. Hinata saying something unnecessary leads to Kageyama and Hinata being officially married! Pairing: Kageyama Tobio x Hinata Shoyo. Warning: Boy X Boy. Rated T just in case.
1. Chapter 1

This is an AU story and a lot of things are made up since I'm too lazy to research gods and deities. So I'll just make them up. Expect OOC-ness (not intended but …) Pairing: Kagehina.

Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyu.

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><p><strong><span>Officially<span>**** Married**

Hinata Shoyo, 23 years, homeless, jobless, his total savings: 100 yen.

xxx

Pride welled up in him as his bride slowly made her way across the newly polished wooden flooring. Courting his bride had been no mean feat but it was worth all the trouble, and that was all he could think of as their joining inched closer.

Kageyama Tobio, age unknown, a wolf and (mostly) fox mix deity.

xxx

"I feel so hungry…" Hinata complained to himself as he walked down the tar road. His parents had kicked him out of the house when he was 20, expecting him to learn independence. He had faced his own fair share of ups and downs in the past 3 years but nothing could compare to his current condition. He owned nothing except the clothes he wore and the bag that hung loosely around his shoulder, with the exception of a 100 yen coin hidden snugly in his pocket. With no shelter or food he trudged down the road in silence, the occasional growling of his stomach breaking the quiet atmosphere around him.

A sudden unexpected change in weather had the brunette running for shelter. His only choice was the nearest shrine which was luckily well kept.

xxx

The two raised the small exquisite sakae dish to their lips, each taking a sip from the dish in turn. Tobio could only glow as he watched Shimizu take a sip out of the dish that he himself had used just a few seconds ago.

Before the two, a cat deity held up the velvet pillow with a ring lying in the middle. "In the presence of the great gods, future head of Shimizu, friend of a thousand years and fox deity, Tobio. I, cat deity Ittetsu Takeda bear witness to the joining of Shimizu Kiyoko and Kageyama Tobio. Putting their holy prayers into this ring, the two shall be married. I pay my reverence."

"In presence of the great god, I Tobio pay my reverence. On this favorable day, the fox deitys of the black nine-tailed clan (Tobio) and the grand fox clan (Kiyoko) exchange vows. For a long time the strife between the two households has been quelled by this joining, and today that amity shall continue. In other words, I will cherish you forever, Kiyoko."Tobio said, shooting Shimizu a dazzling smile as he uttered the last sentence.

Shimizu smiled at the eager male. Despite the strict formality, he was still able to freely move his tongue. She raised her hand; it was her turn to make her vows. The ring began to glow then.

xxx

The sudden downpour grew less and finally stopped. The stop of the rain also meant the beginning of his troubles once again and Hinata made a move to exit the shrine just as a delicious aroma reached his nostrils. He could only halt and turn towards the direction of the smell.

Out of nowhere, a plate of salmon sushi (raw or teriyaki up to you) had appeared right on the spot he had been sitting on. He told himself to leave it. Try as he might though he still ended up making his way towards the dish. He wondered why it was there and how it got there. Glancing left and right and confirming that the place was void of anyone, he reached for the dish.

xxx

Just as she finished her vows, the ring disintegrated into a smoky line and split apart, a line made its way towards Tobio's finger and reassembled there. The other stopped right before Shimizu before zigzagging and charging outdoors. Leaving a very stunned Tobio and a chuckling Shimizu behind.

Takeda paled, his ears twitching nervously. For such a thing to happen at that moment!

xxx

"If I could eat delicious food every day, I would gladly be the fox deity's bride!" Hinata said obliviously as he popped the last sushi into his mouth and allowed the sweet taste to fill his mouth, completely unaware of the fuming fox deity that had materialized before him.

"So it was you who caused me all this trouble." Tobio seethed.

Hinata jumped back in surprise at the sudden appearance, involuntarily swallowing the sushi in his mouth. It only took one glance for Hinata to recognize the two black fox ears on the raven's head. "I'm – I'm sorry – Sir! If I hadn't eaten –"

"Shut up."

"Yes!"

Tobio crouched down, bringing himself face to face with the cowering Hinata. "Human, do you know what you have done?"

Hinata shook his head franticly.

"That ring-" He said, pointing to the ring that was around Hinata's finger. "-was supposed to go around my beloved's finger." He then pointed to Shimizu who had materialized behind him.

"E-Eh?" Hinata lifted his own hand to get a closer look at the ring on his finger.

Lifting his own hand, Tobio showed the brunette his own identical ring. "This shows that we are an officially married couple."

* * *

><p>Comments appreciated. Especially if I made a mistake. Thank you for reading!<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

I'm sorry for using Shimizu this way.

Insert any name here lol: Yes I decided to write a version of it seeing that the ending wasn't quite what I expected. It will be similar at the beginning.

Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyu.

**Insert Choice of Title here**

"This shows that we are an officially married couple."

The ring glowed as if confirming Tobio's words, rendering Hinata completely speechless.

Tobio retracted his own hand and straightened himself. "It took me 15 million years to get the betrothal money and to convince her to marry me. The honor and reconciliation between the two clans rely heavily on this marriage, now what am I going to do about my beloved?"

Hinata bit his lip. This was serious if that was how the deity put it. "Just-Just take off the rings then! This was all a mistake originally!"

Tobio heaved a deep sigh. "Watch." He reached for the ring on his finger, a crackle of blue electricity deflected his hand away and he hissed in pain. The fingers that had tried to remove the ring now had angry lines running down them and a trickle of blood ran down a finger. "It can't be removed that easily. If you had tried to remove it, it would be your death."

Hinata paled. "W-What kind of death ring is this for your bride?!"

"It's not meant to be taken off." Tobio said with a huff.

"Takeda, are you there?" he said loudly.

The cat deity appeared beside him, his ears and whiskers twitching nervously. "What exactly do you want to do now?"

"Could you check for ways to remove the ring?"

"O-Of course! I'll look into it immediately."

"I owe you one." Tobio said and Takeda disappeared.

A small cough came from the back, bringing the duo's attention to her. "This was indeed an unfortunate accident. It's as if someone intends to usurp the reconciliation between the two clans. "

She moved herself between Tobio and Hinata. "As I've thought, I really don't like this." Looking Hinata sharply in the eye, she said "Understand this human. If the ring isn't removed by the next full moon …"

"… I will consume you."

A trail of sweat ran down Hinata's cheek as his eyes widened in horror.

Removing herself from between the duo, she took a step back. "I will now take my leave. I will be looking forward to all your efforts." She stepped away from the duo and her maidens appeared out of thin air, enveloping her in a heavy mist. "Till the next full moon." She said, bidding farewell to the two.

The shroud of mist disappeared as quickly as it came, leaving the two.

Xxx

"Tobio, so I've checked and well there are 3 ways to remove the ring." Takeda said as he placed a book in front of the two. After Shimizu had left, he had been lead into the shrine which to his surprise was modestly decorated.

Hinata stared blankly at the book written in a language that he didn't understand.

"Hinata Shoyo is it?" Takeda asked with a smile. He nodded.

"I'm Takeda Ittetsu, a cat deity." He said, opening the book. "This is written in ancient language so I doubt that you'll understand what it says."

Hinata shook his head, confirming Takeda's words.

"Alright then. I'll explain it to you in detail then." He said cheerily while a hand shifted his glasses into a comfortable position.

"As written in the book, there are only 3 ways to remove the ring." Takeda began. "The first way would be to have one of you die. The ring will disappear and the contract will be removed then."

"Die?" Hinata repeated.

"Yes die."

"That one is out. No matter how much I hate him for ruining my plans to have cute baby foxes with Kiyoko, I can't just kill him." Tobio said. "Married to a human, a man at that!" he spat.

"You're not the only victim here!" Hinata interjected. "My dream was to marry a beautiful girl and live a happy peaceful life!"

"Wow that's a lot coming from someone who actually yelled 'If I could eat delicious food every day, I would gladly be the fox deity's bride!' at the top of his voice! Its cause you said something unnecessary that we're caught in this predicament!"

"Like I would know that on that very day, time and moment that there was a marriage between fox deities! It's not like you announce like 'Hey! There's a marriage going on here!' and then you set a plate of salmon down in front of a homeless, jobless, penniless and hungry individual!"

The two glared at each other. Electricity crackling between the two.

Takeda cleared his throat, catching the duo' attention once again. "The second option would be to have Kiyoko-san eat him. That way, with the disappearance of Hinata, the contract will be considered void and be reversed."

"Rejected!"

"Rejected!" The both said in unison.

"I might be homeless, penniless and jobless but I still don't want to die!"

"Don't say it as if you're proud of it!"

"Theres nothing wrong with being proud about being broke."

"My point being that there is nothing to be proud about!"

"And the third way would be to meet a separation specialist." Takeda said quickly, cutting in to prevent further argument.

"That one is out too." Tobio said quickly without further consideration.

"Deities have a lawyer for divorce too?"

"Not exactly." Takeda said with a laugh.

"They just specialize in separation." Tobio explained. "None of that complicated stuff you humans have."

"Then let's go see this lawyer!"

"I already told you that he's not a lawyer. And we are NOT going to see him."

"Why not?! We have to remove this death ring!"

"Tobio, you don't really have a choice." Takeda reminded. "Kiyoko did say the next full moon, which gives you a grand total of 31 days to remove the ring."

If death wasn't an option, that was definitely his last resort. "…Fine."


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer： I do not own Haikyu!

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><p><span><strong>The God of Separation and Love <strong>

"Tobio, don't you have anything less suspicious-looking to wear." Hinata asked gloomily. They were attracting loads of attention just walking.

Tobio was dressed in a dress shirt with a vest over it and pants. A wore sunglasses and an expensive looking long black fur coat hung loosely off his shoulders He looked like Count Dracula to an extent and a rose was all he needed to perfect the look.

"You look like a really lame yakuza from the Dracula centuries."

Tobio glared at Hinata. "I didn't ask you for your opinion."

"I was kind enough to correct your fashion sense. If you had time to read up on cars you could at least read up on current fashion." Hinata said, grateful that he had been wearing a hoodie that day. After they removed the ring he certainly didn't want to be referred to as 'the guy who was walking with that Dracula century yakuza'.

Hinata had been surprised when Tobio had lead him to a Bugatti Veyron that was parked behind the shrine. With only 29 of its kind in the world he should've been more surprised to see it parked right behind a shrine but he just couldn't muster up the strength to be surprised anymore. He alone found it hard enough to believe that a deity would have better sense for vehicles than fashion. And all the fox had done though was retrieve a bag of items and toss it to him and it was off to the nearest bus stop.

Back to the present then, the two had just gotten off a stop that Hinata wasn't familiar with and were walking down a busy street. Tobio was thrown weird glances and stares by the passer-bys and all Hinata could do to disassociate himself with the guy was to pull down his hood as low as possible to hide his face and walk as far behind the guy as he could without arousing suspicion from Tobio.

"Oi! Why are you walking so far behind?" Tobio asked as he halted in his tracks and turned around to chide Hinata. "My bride should walk beside me." He said loudly, earning more glances from passersby.

If a glare could kill, he was sure that he would have killed Tobio a million times already.

Xxx

"Are we there yet?" Hinata asked as for the umpteenth time the two got off another main street and turned into an alley.

"Almost." Tobio replied and he went up a stairway that Hinata would have been easily overlooked as it was partially hidden behind a pile of old furniture.

Tobio lead them up to the highest floor and to the room at the very end of the floor. He rapped on the door and waited.

"The lawyer lives here?" Hinata asked in a whisper.

"Yes. Why are you whispering?"

"I don't want to disturb the other beings living here."

Tobio raised an eyebrow in amusement. "They're the only beings living here."

Hinata shook his head. "No, not that kind."

Tobio clicked his tongue in annoyance. "There are no ghosts here."

"Really?" Hinata asked doubtfully. The apartment they were now in would have been easily missed unless seen from the sky. It was small in comparison to the skyscrapers that surrounded it and from the looks of the peeling and yellowing paint it looked old and somewhat abandoned.

"Yes now shut up." He snapped and went up to the door and rapped on it again.

The door finally opened a minute later and a bespectacled blonde stepped out.

The two gave each other a long look before the blonde's mouth opened. "If it isn't his highness himself, come to visit a peasant myself has he?"

"Is Yuu in?" Tobio asked, ignoring the blonde's sarcastic tone.

"So the King ignores his subordinates does he?"

"Both of you don't pick a fight in front of the door!" An annoyed voice said and Yuu appeared beside Kei.

"Sorry for disturbing. Yuu, I – We need a favor."

"Oh? Whats this? Shimizu's ring is on this chibi's finger." Kei remarked and he bent down mockingly to face Hinata. "Your highness, do teach me how to marry the wrong person. A human at that."

Xxx

"What's your name?" Yuu asked, ignoring the bickering duo in the background.

"Hinata Shoyo."

"Shoyo is it? I'm Yuu, Nishonoya Yuu. Feel free to just call me Yuu." He said, and he lead Hinata in.

The room was normal, Hinata thought after glancing around. There was a 52LCD TV and a sofa in the middle. And peach coloured curtains hung from the windows, drawn open to let in the nonexistent sun. A little further in was a long rectangular table and a stack of plastic chairs beside it. To conclude things, it was furnished to the minimum of livable.

He motioned for Hinata to take a seat o the sofa and disappeared into what Hinata supposed was the kitchen, reappearing moments later with two bottles of juice. He passed one to Hinata and settled beside him, thumbed the remote control and clicked to the sports channel.

Yuu casually struck up a conversation with Hinata. "Shoyo, do you watch the Men's Volleyball Championships?"

"Yes, I do." He muttered half-heartedly, glancing towards the door way where the two were still bickering.

"Don't worry about them. They do that all the time. Daichi would have kicked their asses if he was here." Yuu reassured and he pointed the remote at the two and clicked on the mute button.

Hinata's eyes widened as the room became completely quiet except of the cheers coming from the TV. "Is-Is that a universal remote?" he stuttered.

"It is." Yuu beamed.

"C-Can I hold it?"

"Feel free." He said and he passed it to the brunette who took the remote like it was a fragile piece of glass that would break with the slightest tap.

"Can I try it?"

"Go ahead."

He clicked on the unmute button and the voices of Tobio and Kei filled the room. He then clicked it again and the room was once again quiet. A sense of awe passed over him and he looked over to Yuu. "This is so cool!"

"Now click the fast forward button, let's get those idiots to hurry up with their hostile conversation." Yuu instructed.

Hinata hit the fast forward button and in a blink of an eye both Tobio and Kei were sprawled on the floor in front of them, exhausted.

"Awesome!" Hinata said once again and he passed the remote back.

"I know right? Though there are some side effects." He said and he got up and disappeared into the kitchen again, reappearing with another 2 bottles of juice which he set beside each exhausted deity.

Recharging…

Yuu muttered thoughtfully under his breath. "I see."

"In other words, you want me to break the contract on the ring." He said with a nod of understanding.

"Please lend us your strength for this." Tobio said with a bow.

Yuu was silent for a moment. "I can't. You are aware that, death is the only way to remove this ring right?"

"You really were trying to kill your bride!" Hinata hissed.

"I wasn't. Shut up."

"This ring was created by the 28th wife of a really old human sorcerer who got divorced 27 times in a span of 9 years. His 28th wife killed herself and him too after she found out that he was still cheating on her."

"….The sorcerer was a playboy." Hinata said slowly.

"He claims otherwise though."

"Is there really no way?" Tobio asked once more.

Yuu thought hard. "For now, I guess your best bet would be to find the old sorcerer himself. He managed to break free after all. He must know of a way then."

"But he's dead." Hinata pointed out.

Yuu smiled. "No worries, he's alive though he's definitely not of the human world anymore. Tobio knows him well too."

Hinata glanced at Tobio. He had a sour resentment filled look plastered on his face.

"Tobio, you were lucky that the intervention of the festival dragged your deadline till the next full moon." Yuu reminded.

"Festival?" Hinata inquired.

Just as Yuu was about to answer the door opened and a young college student with short black hair and freckles stepped in. "I'm home, Tsuki."

Hurrying over, Kei helped the smaller boy pick up his bag and brought it into one of the rooms.

[Note: Tsuki (Moon or Tsukishima's name) . Suki(Love). I've never actually heard of 'Suki'being used to address someone in any anime but I'll use it here.]

Tobio and Hinata looked at the scene unfolding before them before then and then burst into laughter.

"Suki? That's really corny." Tobio said in between laughter.

Hinata who could barely get a proper word pass his lips gave in to his fit of laughter.

"Eh?" Yamaguchi looked at the two, confused.

In irritation, Kei gave the duo each a whack on the head. "He said Tsuki not Suki you deaf idiots."

"You don't have to be shy." Hinata said with a forced straight face before he turned away and returned to laughing.

"I like how you were just going on about me accidentally getting married to a human when you were dating one yourself." Tobio prodded.

"Sticks and stones." Kei said and he grabbed the protesting boy and dragged him into the room he had just exited.

The room was quiet again then.

"I'm surprised that Tsukishima isn't using his powers on him." Tobio said, breaking the silence

"He seems determined to court him without his powers." Yuu said. "Which reminds me, since Yamaguchi is back now. Deities and that ring don't exist. Tsukishima and I decided that it was better to keep it a secret from him."

"Roger." Hinata nodded.

"No human would believe it anyway." Tobio muttered, uninterested.

Yuu hopped off the sofa and stretched. "Just as a precaution then. Want to stay for the night? Yamaguchi's cooking tastes pretty good."

"Don't mind us then." Tobio said.

xxx

"Kiyoko-san…" Yachi called nervously as she stepped into the room.

"Yachi?" Shimizu asked.

"Y-Yes!"

"What is it?"

"Um… I was just wondering how it went with the elders."

Shimizu's eyes narrowed and she was silent for a moment. "Only a deity can kill a deity,"

Yachi trembled at the words. "I'll-I'll get you some tea." She said quickly and excused herself.

Shimizu dragged her heavy dress over to her bed and plopped down on it. She had only meant it as a joke when she had said that she would devour the human but now there was a change of plans.

What peace between the two clans? She scoffed to herself. It never existed. The thread that had held everything together till now was now trembling from the assassination order that had been set on it and very soon, it would break. All for power …

That night, an auburn colored fox exited the mansion's premises.


	4. Chapter 4

There's a Oikawa x Iwaizumi pairing here … previous chap had Tsukishima x Yamaguchi.

Disclaimer： I do not own Haikyu.

* * *

><p><strong><span>The Actual Ring Maker is?!<span>**

The auburn fox glanced around its surroundings, it had put quite a distance between itself and its pursuers. It had left the mansion's premises the moment twilight had ascended the sky and although unsurprised that the mansion would send pursuers, it never expected for its pursuers to have covered as much ground as they did in the small amount of time.

It eyes scanned the lively world below her, catching sight of the 10 pursuers that had been handpicked by the elder. They would find it soon if it didn't move.

It inhaled deeply through its snout. The break less escaping it had done for the entire night had sapped most of its strength despite having travelled into its original form but it just had enough strength left. It was better to get out of the town while it could, it thought. They would head there too. There was no other way to remove the ring.

It closed its eyes and concentrated. First, back to the original form, it thought. A raven haired shoulder length girl slowly took form from the auburn fox. Her dirtied red kimono taking form as her body did but she knew that she didn't have a moment to lose. She could barely mask her presence anymore with what little power she had. Ignoring the present state of her clothes, she closed her eyes and concentrated on the next transformation.

Xxx

Just above the clouds a huge eagle of brown and white-coloured plumage headed towards its next destination at its greatest speed.

Xxx

Hinata woke up to a rough start in the morning. He hadn't been able to recognise his surroundings and had dashed out of the room in bewilderment, only to collide into a foul mooded Tobio who gave him a menacing glare as a scary reminder of the predicament they were still stuck in.

He had then dashed back into the room and barricaded the door for his safety though, he wondered what kind of powers Tobio had as a fox deity had. How long exactly would a mere door be able to hold him off? He didn't like his chances but since Tobio didn't come after him he allowed himself to relax.

"Hinata, you dumbass! Don't go back to sleep!" Tobio yelled from the outside and the chair that had been barricading the door from the inside suddenly flew aside and the door flung open.

"I wasn't!" Hinata protested. "Why are you so angry early in the morning anyway? Is it the 3rd day of your period or something?!"

"No you Dumbass! We've got a train to catch and now you're oversleeping as if you're only missing school or work!"

"I can't read minds, YOUR HIGHNESS." Hinata said, emphasizing Tobio's nickname. It was no wonder why Tsukishima often called the raven "King".

"Both of you idiots, there are people and deities who are trying to catch some sleep." Kei said coldly, poking a head into the room.

He took one look at the condition of the chair that had splintered from the force of impact and scrunched up his nose. "Clean up before you leave." And just like that, he left the two.

The two were silent for awhile, staring blankly into the blank space that used to be Tsukishima.

"Oi, Clean this up, dumbass." Tobio said suddenly.

"Hah?! I wasn't the one who –"Tobio didn't let him finish; he strutted out of the room and disappeared through another door.

"Ass." Hinata muttered.

Xxx

Hinata stretched his stiff muscles. The train ride had taken a whole 4 hours. He had never expected for them to have gone through 2 towns to get to their destination.

He glanced at Tobio. "So where next, King?"

"Don't call me that, you dumbass." Tobio replied, irritated. "We'll take another walk to another stop and take a bus from there."

"Yes. Yes, KING."

He glared at Hinata and stomped off.

Xxx

It was a completely normal neighbourhood, or so Hinata thought. For a neighbourhood this size it was a little too quiet though.

He opened his mouth and asked. "Tobio, does anyone actually live here? It's so quiet here."

"You don't need-"Tobio suddenly halted in midsentence and pulled them to the side of the junction. One of his hands automatically holding Hinata close to him while the other clamped over his mouth.

A girl with messy short orange girl in a white school blouse and dark blue skirt ran past them, an ice cream hanging in between her lips, completely oblivious of the duo's presence.

Tobio waited for the girl to disappear into the distance before he released the brunette. "Let's go."

He stared into the distance. His body began to move on its own and started in the direction where the figure had disappeared to.

"Oi! Where do you think you're going?" Tobio snapped, a hand applying pressure on the brunette's head to keep him in place

'It couldn't be' he told himself.

"Let's go."Hinata muttered and he forced himself to turn away.

Xxx

The moment they got off the bus, Tobio immediately hurried in a northwest direction.

"Listen, whatever you do. Prepare to run." Tobio suddenly said.

"Huh?" Hinata dumbly muttered his thoughts out loud.

"Just do it. This guy hates my guts. I can't guarantee my own safety so there's no way I can guarantee yours."

Hinata froze up. 'A grim reaper? One that can kill deities? Can deities even die?' he thought.

"Oi! Did you hear what I said?" Tobio snapped, impatient that Hinata hadn't replied him.

"Y-Yes!"

"Stop daydreaming, you dumbass. We're stepping into his jurisdiction now." Tobio made a sudden left and went up a flight of steps.

Hinata took a quick look around his surroundings, this was –

a very normal neighbourhood.

'Is Tobio the only one who lives in a shrine?' he wondered. 'Yuu lived in an apartment after all, though it wasn't just one room but the entire building itself that belonged to him.' He had been shocked to find out himself but the feeling of surprise itself soon passed. If Tobio could own one of those Bugatti Veyrons how could Yuu possibly not own an entire apartment building?

He steeled himself, one after another; each deity was showing him something he had not foreseen. He should be used to it by now –

"Oi, we're here."

"Real-ly?" his mouth went slack.

An amused look came about Tobio's face. "What were you expecting?"

"Something NOT this normal." He said, still staring in disbelief at the very normal looking house.

Tobio sighed. "You really don't have a brain do you?"

Ignoring any further 'weird expectations' Hinata had, Tobio reached a hand behind the small wooden door and unhooked the latch that kept it closed. The moment the two stepped in, a small cloud rushed up to greet them, plopping a generous amount of snow on the two before it disappeared with a mischievous giggle.

Hinata swept the snow off his hair and shoulders. 'Okay maybe it wasn't as normal as –'"A-choo!" He shivered. Just a moment ago he starting to feel the summer heat and now he was freezing.

"Here."

He looked up and was surprised to see Tobio holding out his black fur coat to him. He seemed completely unaffected by the snow, untouched by the snow in fact. But still. There was no way in hell he was going to wear the flashy-looking coat. "I'll pass."

"Just wear it; you are still my bride even though accidental. I won't let you die till this ring has been taken off." He said, covering the brunette with his coat.

Hinata's eyes widened in astonishment. 'So Tobio has a better side to him too.'

"After that, you're free to die by vehicle based accidents, suicides, sickness and vehicle based accidents."

'Do you want me to get hit by a truck so bad?!' he screamed mentally.

With a Cheshire cat's grin he went up to the door and pressed on the bell.

"Coming!" an airy voice yelled. Muffled sounds of footsteps combined with crashes and curses and yelps of pain rang throughout the house before it finally came to a stop at the door and it flung open.

A good-looking young looking man with dark brown ruffled hair stepped out of the house and yawned.

"Shittykawa! Stop yawning in front of the house!" a voice yelled furiously and a shoe flew out of the window at the second floor of the house and smacked into the man's face.

The man covered his face in pain for a few moments before he turned to face the window in which the shoe had sailed through. "Iwa-chan! You didn't have to do that! It hurts!"

A man with spiky dark brown hair poked his head out. "Rudekawa, we have guests." With that, he retracted his head and shut the window, preventing the other from whining or complaining further.

With the imprint of the shoe reddening on his face, the man turned towards Tobio with a smile. "It's been awhile, Tobio-chan."

"It's been awhile, Oikawa-san." He replied equally.

Silence filled the airspace and tension filled the air.

"Rudekawa!" the same voice roared and the spiky dark brown haired man appeared at the door with a loose handkerchief hanging around his neck and a white floral patterned apron. "I told you to watch out for the fragile objects already, you Ineptkawa!"

"Iwa-chan, that's mean! You changed my name 3 times in just 2 minutes!"

He ignored the whining Oikawa and turned to Tobio. "It's been awhile, Tobio."

"Nice to see you again, Iwaizumi-san." Tobio returned with a bow.

xxx

"So, Tobio-chan, to whom do I owe this unexpected visit?" Oikawa said as dignifiedly as he could with a huge bump on his head.

"Your 28th wife." Tobio said plainly.

"28th wife?" Oikawa muttered to himself, deep in thought. He then gave Tobio a wide smile. "Who?"

".. You really are the worst; you can't even remember your own wives." Tobio mumbled under his breath.

"Tobio-chan, I know that you know that I hate your guts but I've only had 27 wives…" Oikawa said, leaning back into his chair, a peace sign on his fingers.

"…and 1 husband." He said with a wide grin as Iwaizumi stepped into the living room with 4 tins of soft drinks.

"…" the two stared at Iwaizumi. There had to be no one else. No one could handle Oikawa other than him.

"What?" Iwaizumi asked the two in confusement. He then turned towards Oikawa and pulled roughly on the guy's ear. "Shittykawa did you say something unnecessary again?"

Tobio and Hinata turned away to have their own discussion.

"Wait, so it's the 28th husband and NOT wife?" Hinata asked.

"28th marriage would be the correct way of putting it but even so, Iwaizumi-san wouldn't get all possessive over Oikawa-san."

"He doesn't hit me as someone like that either." Hinata agreed.

"What did you do to the ring I gave you!?" Oikawa cried.

"Nothing! Don't make it seem like I attract girls like you!"

"Oh~ that's right, no girls would go for Iwa-chan with me around."

"If there's anyone that should be worried about anyone two-timing that should be –"Iwaizumi halted in mid sentence and turned to see a very amused duo eating popcorn that had appeared out of nowhere while watching the drama unfolding before them.

"Ah, don't mind us. Do continue." Tobio said.

"This popcorn tastes good!" Hinata said as he picked up another handful and shoved it into his mouth.

It turns out that Iwaizumi was more possessive than they thought.

Xxx

"So it wasn't Iwaizumi who made this ring?" Hinata asked, reaching a conclusion from the story of the making of the ring.

"It was me." Oikawa admitted. "I was afraid that Iwa-chan would be snatched by some other man so I made it for him."

'… uwaa, possessive.' The two thought.

"In other words, Oikawa-san doesn't trust Iwaizumi-san." Tobio said straightforwardly.

Oikawa's face darkened and a vein popped out of his forehead but now with a feigned smile he asked sweetly "Tobio-chan, are you trying to pick a fight?"

"No I wasn't. I was trying to state the truth." He replied innocently.

"You-!"

Iwaizumi held him back. "Tobio stop razzing Oikawa and Oikawa, you're too old to fall for stuff like this."

"I apologize." Tobio said.

"Why the hell do you have it?!" Oikawa cried.

He raised his own hand and with his other, raised Hinata's own hand.

Silence filled the room for a second and suddenly Oikawa burst out laughing.

"Shut up! Do something about the mess that you made!" Iwaizumi gave the laughing man a hard knock on the head.

"I-Iwa-chan ! Ow! Haha! Don't you – find it – curious – how it – ended up – like that? Haha!"

"Can I please shoot him?" Tobio asked Iwaizumi.

"Please refrain." Iwaizumi said.

Xxx

"That was funny!" Oikawa had been laughing for a continuous 10 minutes now. "I can't believe how Chibi-tan could so freely yell 'If I could eat delicious food every day, I would gladly be the fox deity's bride!' This is rich!" he continued laughing then.

"Let's stuff a sock in his mouth and hope that it suffocates him." Tobio suggested, annoyed from all the laughing Oikawa was doing.

"It's as if he's inhaled laughing gas." Hinata whispered and Tobio nodded in agreement.

"Oikawa!" Iwaizumi said sternly and he pulled hard on his ear.

"Ha- Ow! Ow! Ow! Iwa-chan! That- hurts! I'll stop – laughing! Ow!"

In irritation, Iwaizumi rolled (literally) Oikawa off the couch and kicked him out of the room, slamming shut the door and turning the lock before he went back to his seat.

"Oikawa doesn't know how to remove it." He began immediately. "He had it made on a whim without thinking of a way to remove it and I am forced to confirm that death really is the only way to remove the ring."

"But you removed it!" Tobio argued.

"Yes, I did but it was only after 10 years worth of travelling. Exactly 10 years after I left, I returned back from travelling and the ring just dropped off."

"It just dropped off?" Hinata repeated.

"Isn't there some clue?" Tobio asked hopefully.

Iwaizumi shook his head. "It just dropped off like a leech that's eaten its fill of blood."

"Iwaizumi-san, could you please give tell us where you went in that 10 years?" Tobio suddenly asked after a moment of silence.

"You intend to travel to all the places that I've been to in just slightly less than a month?" Oikawa asked, his brows furrowing in disbelief.

"First, I intend to travel to all the towns or villages that show indication of exceptionally strong spiritual influence. I'll check the secondary towns and villages after that."

"It's a good choice." Iwaizumi agreed. "I'll give you a list of all the places I've gone to then."

Tobio stood up and bowed. "Thank you for your help."

Xxx

"Bye, Tobio-chan, Chibi-tan!" oikawa said brightly with a wave. He looked genuinely happy to see the two depart. "Don't come back – Ow!"

"You're not 5!" Iwaizumi scolded. He had hit the other man for the umpteenth time that day.

"Thank you for all your help."

"Thanks." The both bowed and went on their way.

"Iwa-chan!" the composed face Oikawa had once again disappeared the moment the two were out of sight.

"Why the hell are you pouting again?" Iwaizumi asked in irritation.

"The ringggggggggg." He whined. "I made it for my Iwa-chan too!"

"Forget about it. I'll always stay by your side anyway." Iwaizumi said. "I'll wear the one you gave me when we were dating."

"You still keep it?" Oikawa asked in disbelief.

"I didn't want a ring that would fall off anyway." He said with a huff. "A contract by a ring is meaningless anyway."

"I-Iwa-chan." Oikawa said slowly with a look of admiration on his face.

Iwaizumi jumped back a little, slightly flustered from the way Oikawa was looking at him. "W-What?"

"That was cool!"

POW! (Sound of Iwaizumi whacking Oikawa)

"I-Idiot!" he stuttered and he started to saunter off, but Oikawa stopped him by wrapping his arms around the shorter man's neck and placing his head on his shoulder.

"Iwa-chan, I'll take your words as your proposal." And he abruptly grabbed the shorter man's face and turned it slightly, his mouth capturing Iwaizumi's in a rough kiss.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyu.

* * *

><p><span><strong>She would never be here.<strong>

Hinata glanced out of the window absent-mindedly, from what Tobio had said; they were now headed back to the neighbourhood that they had last been in and the picture of the girl with the ice cream in her mouth running past him refused to go away.

She wasn't particularly beautiful nor did she possess any of those gorgeous curves that she would obtain with time. It wasn't that Hinata had some sort of uniform fetish and he wasn't a paedophile. He just, loved her. He loved her from the very depths of his heart but he knew that there was no way that she would be here; it was probably just someone who looked alike, very scarily alike.

Because she would never be here.

Xxx

The two ran for cover as quickly as they could, the downpour had been so sudden and had started the moment they had hopped off the bus.

Stopping under the cover of a shop house, the two took a breather.

"What is with … the sudden downpour?" Tobio muttered between gasps.

"You're a deity. Can't you … do something …about it?" Hinata inquired in between his own gasping.

The two had run a considerable distance. The bus stop was nowhere near any shelter and they had to make a run for it.

"I can't control the weather." Tobio huffed. "Not here anyway."

"So you CAN control the weather?"

"Yes but just not here."

"Was it you who made it rain that hour before you appeared before me?"

"No. That was Mother Nature."

"… Somehow that seems hard to believe…"

Tobio ignored him and silence resumed between the two.

A sudden soft 'pitter patter' broke their silence and the duo glanced into the distance. There was a lone figure running in the heavy rain. As the figure grew closer in the distance, a drenched messy mop of orange hair came into view.

Hinata's eyes widened and before he knew it, Tobio had hugged him from behind and hissed. "Shut up and stay still."

Drenched from head to toe, she took shelter under the same shop house that Hinata and Tobio were under. She never noticed the two though and Hinata had realised that too. He struggled a little in Tobio's grasp much to the raven's displeasure and managed to turn around enough to see the girl who was just behind them.

He immediately wished that he didn't. The girl that was now trying to dry her drenched clothes with an equally doused handkerchief really was her. He opened his mouth, he wanted to call out to her but a choke escaped his lips instead.

She was alive. The number 1 girl in his life really was alive.

Tobio had felt uneasy since the appearance of the girl with the similar hairstyle and hair colour as Hinata's. It was the second time they had seen her and he had watched her the entire time. She hadn't seen them at all. It was good. It was how it should be. Then he had felt Hinata struggle in his grasp and turn to look at the girl. He wanted to yell at him 'Now's not the time to look at girls, you dumbass!' but the drastic change in Hinata's expression stopped him.

It was time to go.

The choke that escaped Hinata's lips was all the motivation he needed and he willed an invisibility spell over them. He threw the brunette over his shoulder like a sack and ran into the rain. Hinata's yelp lost in the thundering sound of the downpour.

Xxx

Tobio knew where he was going. There was only one place where they could stay. It had been his destination from the beginning.

"Tobio! Let me down!" Hinata yelled, pounding on the raven's back.

He was crying, Tobio could tell. His voice sounded so strangled and painful, a huge contrast to his usual bubbly voice that shone through his ever idiotic expectations and words and he felt himself waver a little. But an even bigger weight settled atop his chest.

He didn't want Hinata to hate him.

If he had talked to her at that time, there was no guarantee that the unhealed wound in his chest would heal. It could have begun to bleed instead and it was probably already bleeding. And at the end of the day, it would be empty.

"Tobio. Please." He begged.

Steeling himself, Tobio took the last turn and ran up to the covers of the shrine that lay straight ahead.

"Daichi! Koushi!" he yelled, banging on the door to the shrine.

The door slid open almost immediately and Tobio immediately hauled Hinata off his shoulder and set him as gently as he could on the Tatami mat all while willing the brunette into a slumber.

He had been reluctant to use his powers on Hinata but with Hinata's current unstable mentality and emotions, it would be better this way.

The brunette beneath him blinked once, twice then his eyes slowly shut. Tobio did a quick check that Hinata wasn't hurt from the rough handling before he turned to the dark haired man who had opened the door for them.

"Dai-"he began but the man raised a hand in understanding and he waved them towards an empty room.

Tobio reached beneath Hinata's knees and back and hefted the brunette up. It had surprised him that Hinata wasn't all that heavy, though he should have expected it. He bridal carried the sleeping brunette to the room and laid him gently on the futon.

"Tobio, Koushi will attend to him. In the meantime, I need to talk to you." The man said and Tobio followed him out of the room.

Xxx

"Let's begin from what happen." Daichi said, settling on a cushion.

Tobio took the seat opposite him. "He saw someone he knew very well. He wanted to talk to her but I stopped him before he could."

"Forcefully I bet." Daichi muttered with a facepalm.

"The results were that she didn't notice our presence at all."

"Tobio, I'm not saying that what you did is wrong but, you could have handled the situation more delicately?"

"Like how?" Tobio inquired.

"Explain to him the consequences of messing up the time loop which the spirits live in."

"That would be too troublesome" Tobio said almost immediately. "He wouldn't get it."

Daichi facepalmed once again. He should never have hoped that Tobio could handle a situation in a more gentle manner.

"On to the main point." Daichi sighed. "Was that the first time?"

"No."

"When?"

"On the way to Oikawa-san's place."

Daichi sighed. "This can't happen again. Koushi can only erase his memory once."

"I'll look after him." Tobio promised.

"Go get changed. Koushi should have already prepared a change of clothes for you." He said, pointing to the room that Hinata was sleeping in.

He bowed to the yukata clad man and made his way to the room. As he expected, Hinata was still asleep. With the amount of power he had used, he should expect the brunette to not wake for 2 days. Koushi would erase his memory in that time and he would investigate the origins of the power that attracted spirits to the place like moths to a light.

Xxx

"Nii-chan!"

Hinata turned in his sleep.

"Nii-chan!"

He pulled his pillow over his ears.

"Nii-chan! Wake up!"

He jolted awake and cringed in pain as something or someone had put their whole body weight on him.

"Wake up! You'll be late for college!"

The girl who had woke him up had the same messy hair and colour he had. She was clad in a white blouse and a dark blue skirt, her bag hung loosely on her shoulder.

"If you don't wake up now, I'll finish your breakfast!" she threatened and she hopped of the bed and ran out of the room.

"Natsu!" He finally realised that his breakfast was in danger and he jumped out of bed and dashed downstairs.

He reached the bottom of the stairs only to find out that his sister was nowhere to be found and his mother was busy in the kitchen. "Where's Natsu?" he asked.

"She just went out to school. She has cleaning duty today." She replied her son.

Hinata pulled out a chair at the dining table and plopped down on it. He then folded his arms and set his head on top of it. He had been tricked.

His mother came out of the kitchen then and set his breakfast in front of him. "Eat up. You have college soon."

Hinata sighed and he took his hands off the table. "Itadakimasu."

Xxx

The moment classes ended, Hinata was the first out of the door. Lectures were boring as hell to him. He couldn't say exactly that he was keeping up with his lessons but the amount of educational input his brain allowed was small in comparison to the amount of un-educational input it allowed and it reminded him of all the effort he had put into being accepted into his high school.

That didn't matter now though. He was free from lectures and now, he would head over to Natsu's middle school and walk home with her.

Xxx

He was early, he realised. The school grounds were quiet as classes were still taking place. He settled on the bench opposite the school and pulled out a manga from his bag to read.

A short while later, he heard the bell that signalled the end of class ring. He shut the book and kept it back in his bag.

Natsu was easy to spot in the crowd of students that poured out of the school. Nearing the end of her middle school days, she was one of the tallest few girls in the school unlike her brother who was one of the shortest in his middle school days. Though, he felt that it was curious as to why she was late that day, he still waited patiently for her.

She finally appeared after a while. She stopped before the road and checked for cars before she hurried over to him. "Nii-chan, sorry I'm a little late."

"It's fine. Let's go home then." He said, picking up his bag. He was about to move when his eyes caught sight of an ugly bruise that peeked out from underneath her sleeve.

"Natsu, where did you get that?" He pointed at it.

She looked confusedly at him for a second before she followed the direction his finger was pointing in and saw the bruise. Her mouth turned into an 'O' shape. "I got that just now in gym class; I accidentally knocked my shoulder against one of the steel racks there earlier."

"You have to be careful, you klutz." He sighed.

"Nii-chan, you're one to talk! Just the other day you wore your T-shirt inside out!" she retorted.

"I-I- I was half asleep!" he argued, flustered.

Her brother wasn't cool, tall, and handsome or anything like the other brothers her friends claimed to have but she loved him anyway. After all, he was her Nii-chan and everything else about him made up for it.

"Anything you say, Nii-chan!" she stuck her tongue out at her brother and she ran off in front of her brother.

"Natsu –"

It all happened in slow motion before his eyes.

It hadn't been there.

It wasn't there before.

The sound of the crash was deafening and it rang heavily in his eardrums. Screams erupted around him but all he could see was the hand that protruded out from underneath the car.

"**NATSU!"**

Xxx

The first day was a total bust; a total waste of time was how Tobio would put it. The origins of the power were even harder to follow than he had thought. He had walked throughout the town in hopes of finding a trail. His efforts were not rewarded though. No matter where he went, the power felt even and there was no division in power that could give him a clue as to where the origin stood.

He stepped into the room and carelessly threw his coat and vest carelessly onto a seat and unbuttoned his dress shirt. It was a warm night that night. He then he marched towards the other end of the room and slid open the screen. The almost full moon shined brightly in the sky, illuminating the dark room.

Tobio headed back in and he grabbed a candle, lighting it with the lighter that was set beside it. He then set it back on the small table it was on. Suddenly feeling that someone was watching him, he made a 180 degree turn and scanned the room. There was no one –

A glimmer caught his eyes and he glanced down towards the sleeping Hinata, in time to see a tear trail down the brunette's cheek.

"Hinata?" Tobio called softly but he received no reply. Worry quickly crept into his heart and he kneeled down beside the brunette. "Oi, what's wrong you dumb-"

He quickly cut off his own words. Was he a big enough jerk and idiot to pick on someone who was already in tears.

"Oi! Hinata!" he hissed, he couldn't be loud. He had come back pretty late. Daichi and Koushi were already in bed and he didn't want to disturb them. "Hinata!" he shook the brunette lightly.

The tears continued to fall and on the verge of panic, Tobio was just about to rush over to Daichi and Koushi's room when suddenly one of Hinata's hands reached out and latched onto his sleeve.

"Natsu, please don't leave me."

Tobio's eyes widened for a few seconds, was Natsu the name of the girl they had saw yesterday, he wondered.

"Don't leave mother … father … or me." A sob escaped his lips.

He put two and two together. The similar hairstyle and hair colour. That slightly boyish style that was similar to Hinata's. The mention of his mother and father in his pained sleep. He then understood, Hinata didn't just know her, the two were bound by the same blood.

He couldn't understand it though. He personally never had parents or siblings. He was a deity ever since he could remember, a lone deity. But the pained tearful face before him told him enough.

He reached into his pocket with his free hand and brought out a white handkerchief and began to gently dry the tears on Hinata's face.

Xxx

Hinata grunted. The sun was awfully bright and it burned through his eye lids. He turned to his side, trying to avoid the blinding sunlight that was hitting straight on his face. He was contented, for a few moments anyway. It was still too bright!

He gritted his teeth, annoyed at himself. Did he forget to close the curtains again? He slowly opened his eyes, allowing them time to adjust to the blinding brightness. His vision slowly adjusted. He was face to face with a sound asleep Tobio.

He looked peaceful and innocent, he thought. A complete contrast to his personality when he was awake.

He nearly jumped back when those closed eye lids flew open to reveal the shimmering black orbs behind them.

"M-Morning."

Tobio blinked sleepily and he sat up. "Morning." He glanced around his surroundings for a few seconds. "Dammit, I fell asleep."

Hinata sat up too. "Which reminds me, why are you sleeping on my futon?"

Tobio shot him an annoyed look and lifted up his hand to show him the hand that was still latched onto his sleeve. "A sleepy head with the name of Hinata Shoyo decided to latch onto me in the middle of his slumber."

Hinata blanked out for a second before he quickly retracted his hand. "S-Sorry" a slight pink tinted his cheeks.

"Thank to that, I didn't get to sleep very comfortably."

Hinata's face suddenly cleared as if he had just realised something. "Tobio, you could have just taken off your dress shirt."

Realising his mistake, Tobio's face flared. "Sh-Shut up!"

"Yes, your highness." Hinata teased with a snigger and he backed away out of Tobio's whacking range.

Tobio jumped up "Hinata, you dumbas-!" and tripped over the futon.

"Ow! Tobio, you elephant!" Hinata said with a grimace.

Tobio picked himself up, rubbing the bump on his head. "Who are you calling an elephant, you dumbass?!"

It was just their luck then that the door slid open. "Tobio…" the light haired man trailed off.

The two were in an awkward position. Tobio with an unbuttoned dress shirt hovered above Hinata with both his hands pressing down on the floor on both sides of Hinata's head and of his legs was pressed between the brunette's thighs. And due to the fact that Hinata was wearing one of Koushi's loose fitting yukatas, one of the shoulders had slid off in the fall to reveal the milky skin beneath it.

It seemed as if he had just interrupted something. He forced a smile though. "Breakfast is ready, come to the dining room when you're done. I'll keep the food warm." With that, he turned away with a blush and quickly shut the door.

"Did he just …" Tobio muttered.

"What?" Hinata questioned blankly.

Tobio sighed. "Screw it. I have to quickly clear up this misunderstanding." He removed himself from above Hinata.

"What misunderstanding?" Hinata asked.

Tobio shot him a look. "He thought that you and I were about to do it."

"Do it?" Hinata asked, cocking his head to a side.

Tobio's eyebrows pricked in disbelief. "You really are a dumbass."

"HAH?! What does this have to do with me asking what 'do it' means?" Hinata said stubbornly.

Tobio sighed. "I don't want to teach you stuff like that." He began to walk towards the door but he was forced to stop when Hinata grabbed on to his sleeve。

He began to turn towards the brunette. "What is it …"

He halted in midsentence at the completely honest and determined face Hinata had. "One day I'll make you teach me!"

Tobio felt his face flare up at Hinata's innocent determined words.

"YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, YOU DUMBASS!"

WHAM!

" OWWWW!"

Hinata's cry of pain could be heard loud and clear beyond the shrine grounds.

* * *

><p>For anyone that likes this story:<p>

I know that I'm slow at updating already but now I have a part time job so very very possibly, It'll take me longer to update now.

Thank you for reading. Critics especially welcomed.


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